Today is one week to the day (pretty much to the minute as I write this) that I said good-bye to my Baby Girl. (My Mastiff for those of you not already in the know). It was a terribly hard decision to make, because while her legs were failing, her heart and her mind were still so very apparent.

A while back I read An Angel With Fur by Russell Blake about his loss of his dog and bawled my way through most of the book. I knew without a doubt how much it would pain me to say good-bye to Baby. I just didn't know that I had less than a year left with her.

I remember Russell saying something along the lines of all of us think our pets are absolutely the greatest or the most special. I agree. If you're smart when you choose an animal, then they choose you almost as much as you choose them. It's almost as if you're finding each other, which makes it a perfect fit.
 
I will admit I was absolutely floored by just how much grief I felt with her loss. I knew it would be hard, but it absolutely flattened me the day following her passing. I was further stunned as I found myself getting emotionally sideswiped off and on throughout the week. There were so many moments in my days that I didn't realize she had been a part of, and they would sneak up on me. I anticipated hearing her whine through the door after I pulled into the garage. I actually heard her sigh as I adjusted the blankets in preparation for getting into bed the other night, this was a normal occurrence that I don't know if it was out of disturbance or satisfaction that all were accounted for now. I went outside to sit and thought I should head in because she didn't come out with me. I would find myself trying to step over her as I'd get up off the couch, because she would always sit right below me. I came home from walking one morning, and it hit like a ton of bricks that she wouldn't be on the other side of the door wagging her tail when I opened it.

That was one of the best moments with Baby was when I came home. She was so excited when I walked in the door. It didn't matter if I had only stepped outside for a few minutes, she was so happy I was back in the house. She would do this little tap dance with her feet until I set down whatever I had in my hand. Then she'd circle me while I petted her head and back. Next was the crazy figure-8 she'd do, I don't know if this was a way of marking me or to make sure I reached all possible parts of her body. Only once she was done with this ritual could I then walk away and know she wouldn't follow my every step.

A friend once told me that I have a penchant for choosing pets with the largest sense of personality that she's ever met. None of our pets are ever just animals. They always seem to have these quirks (neuroses, if you will) that make them truly unique. Baby was no different. She was a large, 185-lb bundle of personality.

It seems her whole goal in life was to love and to be loved. She, without a doubt, fulfilled her purpose to the utmost. Everyone who ever met her fell in love with her. "What a sweetheart you are" was a favored saying around her. She would adore anyone who took the time to pet her ears, scratch her back, or rub her belly. She was an adoration whore. She'd bare that belly for just about anyone with a kind voice and strong hand.

I think the biggest compliment to her beautiful soul was the fact that everyone we knew was so happy to know they'd have a last opportunity to see her and spoil her before she was gone. Even a couple of friends who had been bitten by large dogs when they were younger had said she was the dog that brought them around on large breeds not being dangerous.

But I could go on forever about my Baby Girl and drive you all insane with it all. But I won't. I just want to thank all of you who left comments and who sent emails. It was all truly appreciated. I also want to thank the authors who have been so extremely patient with me during this time. You all have been so utterly gracious, I can never thank you enough!

Making up for lost time, there will be a slew of reviews coming your way this week:
Puppet Parade
Love is a Wounded Soldier
The Girl's Guide to Dating Zombies
and a review for an upcoming release by the author June Ahern.